Writer: Emmariel Ares
Edited by: Kiddie Rodaje
I love singing. If there is one thing I can say that I am most passionate about, it would be singing. My mother used to be a singer and people say I inherited my talent from her. When I was younger, my main focus was studying and getting good grades. But somehow, it felt like something was missing from my life. When I was in grade 6, I discovered singing and since then, it became part of me. It made me complete. When I was 15 years old, I auditioned for It’s Showtime’s Tawag ng Tanghalan. I got in but unfortunately, I was not able to answer their call on time and I wasn’t able to perform. Nevertheless, that was the start of my singing career. I finally found my dream! But, life doesn’t always go the way we want it to. It is not every day that you will be singing happy songs. Everything changed when my dad was sent to jail.
The day it happened felt like everything was going in slow motion. My happiness was suddenly taken away in an instant. I was so confused and hurt. I didn’t know what to think anymore. I was only a high school student and I became depressed because of what happened. I didn’t know what to say every time my younger siblings ask where our father was. I was so unhappy that I even considered taking my own life. The sadness was so heavy that I wanted to just be gone forever. It hurt so much more when I hear my mom cry. Everything was happening too fast and it was all too much! I just wanted to scream that I was so tired of everything!
One day, while we were visiting my dad in jail for a family day celebration, the image of my family eating and happily chatting about random things woke me up from my misery. I found a new purpose in life. My family needed me. As the eldest in the family, I decided that I will take care of my family! Fighting to survive was what I needed to do instead of wallowing in misery. It may be difficult but I will not let problems keep me down forever.
I wanted to earn so I can help with our finances but looking for a job was difficult because I was still a high school student. The part-time jobs I found were not paying me enough. To earn more I needed to do what I excelled at! The answer was always there, it’s singing! I went back to singing and I worked as a singer for a popular local radio station. I also did gigs as the vocalist of a local band. I loved pursuing my passion for singing while earning an income. I spent my days attending classes while working as a singer. It felt good being able to help my family even though I was still a minor and a student.
We were able to save enough money to get my father out of jail on bail. Thankfully, he was able to get back on his feet. He’s been doing well ever since his release and things at home started getting better. I know that my father is a good man and he has always been a doting father to all of us so I believe he’ll do better from now on. Even though the situation at home got better, I still wanted to earn for myself so I wouldn’t need to ask for money from my parents anymore. I was very happy working as a singer. Then, the pandemic happened. It became impossible for us to perform as a band in public places and we eventually lost our jobs. Lockdown and quarantine are terrible but at least, I get to spend quality time with my family. I’ve learned to look at the positive side of things and be grateful for the blessings that I still get every single day.
2021 so far has been a roller coaster for me. But like I always say to myself before I sleep, I am a survivor! My fate is up to me. I have to set aside my singing career to continue earning. I am now a first-year B.A. Psychology college student slash call center agent. I chose to study Psychology because I want to understand the human mind better and I want to use my own experiences to help people. I answer modules by day and take calls by night. Aside from the income, working in the BPO industry is a great place to work because the employees get to develop themselves. I was able to discover sides of myself I never knew before. Every day, I am learning how to communicate better and socialize with different people. I learn to be patient and understanding even in stressful situations. About a month ago, I have been experiencing extreme pain during my red days but I brushed it off as normal. But then it lasted for a month and I started getting worried. I went to the doctor and found out that I have polycystic ovary syndrome or PCOS. I admit I was scared at first. But the doctor explained to me that there are various things I can do to alleviate the pain. It’s not as stressful as I thought it would be. Being in the BPO industry has taught me to be a stronger and more responsible version of myself.
I still love singing. And I would still love to pursue a singing career in the future. My passion for singing will always be in my heart and a big part of who I am. But for now, I’m going to focus on my job and my studies. Life is unpredictable and you never know what will happen tomorrow! I’ve learned to have an open mind and a prepared heart for the challenges of life. Life like a song, can be a happy and easy one or a very challenging piece, but I will always be a survivor. Laban lang!
